Have you ever had a person in your life who supposedly was your friend but acted nothing like it? Who instead of serving as a source of emotional support, drained you of all energy? Well I have my share of encounters with such blood sucking leeches.
There is one particular girl I know who makes it a point to throw negative comments my way. She never has anything nice to say about other people. The people she claims are friends are the same people she so quickly back stabs without batting an eye. I know if she can do that to them, then she's doing the same thing to me behind my back. Clearly she was never given the "If you don't have anything nice to say, then keep your mouth shut" speech. I feel so drained every time I have the misfortune of hanging out with her. She sucks the joy right out of me. Why am I even friends with her? Good question, she's not my friend; she's a frenemy.She fits the mold of a wolf in a sheep's skin; a devil pretending to be an angel; an enemy cleverly disguised as a friend. I'm done with her; she's been relieved of her duties as a 'friend."
Goodness gracious, is it really that difficult to be nice? Are some people just incapable of being pleasant? Can't we all just get along? With time I have learned to detach myself from Ms. frenemy and her kind. I simply cut them out of my life and replace them with the positive energy exuded by good-spirited people. I choose not to waste my time and energy on such people. Life is too short; I choose to enjoy every minute of it. I have no time for B.S. I have no time for frenemies. Next!
To say that I am frustrated would be the understatement of the century. I surpassed that point right about the time the umpteenth door was slammed in my face. So much for that perfect picture I had painted on the canvas that is my highly imaginative mind. The plan was to graduate and start the rest of my beautiful life. I would have so many job offers to pick and choose from. After all I didn't spend the last four years just filing my nails in college you know, I actually gained an education. Well woop de do! Clearly employers didn't get that memo.
Everyone tells me I chose the right profession. "They'll be breaking down doors to get a piece of you", "You'll get a job faster than a speeding bullet", "You'll always have a job" ......a few of the statements that have been thrown my way. Well I must have wax in my ears, or maybe I'm losing my mind. Surely they didn't say I would get a job super quick?
Every potential employer who has turned me down has fed me the same story: I don't have the necessary experience to be hired without undergoing an internship first. That's fair enough, but here's the downer...there are not enough internship positions at the moment. Pray tell how I am meant to get experience if nobody wants to hire me?
A few weeks ago, I was up to my brow in deadlines. I longed for some vacation time.Well I got what I wished for and then some. Fast forward to the present and here I am, a new graduate tired of idling around. A few weeks of major bumming can get old pretty quick. You can only watch so much TV and take so many cat naps before you begin to feel like an old useless hag. I need something to do. I need a job! Preferably sometime this century? Hopefully this week will be fruitful. You know what I'll let my optimistic alter ego take the wheel. Things WILL be better this week. Yes I will. Yes I can. I believe.
Image retrieved from http://www.curatormagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/job-search.jpg
Most women I know have a sixth sense: female intuition; a force to be reckoned with. I've learned from experience not to turn a deaf ear to that little nagging voice. It has become part and parcel of my life, warning me of potentially dangerous situations. It is yet to fail me.
Ignoring that little voice in the past has cost me dearly. I dated a dodgy character of a man a few years ago. As the relationship progressed I saw little tell tale signs that I chose to ignore. I suspected he wasn't being faithful to me (all thanks to that little voice) but I chose not to believe it. I noticed certain aspects of his personality reflected in his behavior that raised a red flag but I chose to ignore that as well. I blamed it on unchecked paranoia. I brushed the seeds of doubt into the background and proceeded to give the relationship my all. Needless to say the truth always comes out. True enough, he showed his true colors and I came to the realization that my initial doubts about him were indeed warranted. Female intuition could have come to my rescue had I paid it mind.
I compare female intuition to an innate maternal instinct; a mother can always sense when her child is troubled. Usually the subconscious and conscious beings are distinct; with the subconscious for the most part beyond our comprehension. I would like to think that this sixth sense is my subconscious coming to the surface to communicate with my conscious being.
Female intuition serves as my personal guardian angel. Protecting me from adverse situations if I take heed of it's warnings. As is always the case, all is revealed in due course.
I am not one to feed off stereotypes, but sometimes it becomes clear that there is some truth to them.
A few weeks ago I woke up and realized I was out of my essential breakfast goodies (gotta have that Special K cereal and soy milk), so I made a quick run to Walmart (aye these people need to pay me for the free advertising I'm doing here for them). Everything was peaceful, the background music was soothing, there weren't too many people there that early in the morning. It was calm, just like I like it. I don't like too much noise when I first wake up or at any other time for that matter.
So anyway after I picked my items (plus a few unnecessary goodies)I loaded my trolley and headed over to the check-out lanes. Well, the closer I got to the tellers, the more the background sounds were overshadowed by a loud shrieking noise. Stacks of shelves were blocking my view so I couldn't tell where the source of the commotion was from. Being the drama lover that I am. I broke into a brisk walk, not wanting to miss out on anything. When I turned the corner, I located the source. A little man, (probably around 5'2) was yelling his lungs out, and fiercely gesturing because the teller had accidentally charged him for one item twice. Oh no, people can't make mistakes, no-no. Little man had to show the teller who was boss. Can you say drama queen? Golly! A quiet early morning shopping trip had been turned into a clip from a Jerry Springer show. The smirks on people's faces was testament to the fact that we all welcome drama once in a while (well as long as you're not the cause of it). I almost expected little man to climb onto the counter and jump up and down while screaming like the tantrum throwing toddler he had shown as he was. I was so tickled.
Little man's highly amusing antics were not the first I have observed from vertically challenged people. So what is it about some short people (men in particular) that causes them to act out? Feelings of inadequacy maybe? Why does it seem like they don military attire in readiness for combat at all times? Well being a tall person myself, I am so far removed from the issues they have to deal with. All I can do is try to understand the reasons behind their actions. School me, somebody. I am ready and willing to learn...
A wise person once said that you don't know what you have until you lose it. It's also true that you don't know what you've been missing until it arrives. My past relationships left a lot to be desired; I always ended up hurt. A girl can only take so much heartache, consequently with time I more or less wrote off the male species. I made the conscious decision to keep my heart under lock and key.
Well, love has a way of tracking you down and taking you captive when you least expect it. Cupid has quite an aim. Combine that with fate working it's magic and you have a recipe for a fairytale love story. I found my prince charming. I kissed a couple of frogs, but I finally found him. To find someone who understands me; brings me immense joy; treats me like a queen and loves me unconditionally is without a doubt a blessing. Many search for such love, most are unsuccessful. I am one of the lucky few and for that I will be forever grateful.
My shattered heart is whole again; overflowing with love that knows no bounds. I'm happy... I'm content... I have been swept off my stiletto wearing feet... I am smitten.
I finally graduated! It was an amazing ceremony (the first of two). I'm glad it's over and done with though, the days leading to it were emotionally and physically draining. Several friends and family came out to show their support. I wish my brother and my man could have been here too. Oh well it's a good thing I have another graduation ceremony in a few months. To say I'm super excited would be a major understatement. I'm bouncing off the walls! I barely remember the last time I had this much time to myself. Sweet, sweet freedom!
It's the day after tomorrow! I can't believe it's finally here! I picked my bro from the airport this morning. It was a little funny come to think of it. It's not too long ago when he would hold my hand and walk me to school. Where did the years go? It's great having him around. I wish we all lived in the same state. *sigh*
In other news..... I have an unnecessary online class that's stressing me out. I have to complete by Friday. Oh they just have to torture us until the very end huh? I'll probably have to pull an all-nighter tonight. Wish me luck!
One more thing... I'm still basking in unexpected but appreciated attention and affection. I am positively blissful; the happiest I've been in a while:-)
3 days to graduation baby! Mad excitement! After Friday I won't have to deal with certain people's melodramatic antics anymore! Yipeee Now all I have to do is figure out what I'm going to wear on my big day. Dress? Pants? Birthday suit? tee hee I still can't believe I'm done with school (for now anyway). It's been my life since I was in diapers! What am I meant to do with all this free time? Surely not party, and make up for lost time? *gasp* Mad excitement!
PS 5.00pm: I got the loveliest flowers I've ever seen from the sweetest guy I've ever met. Oh how I love surprises :-)
Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most guys don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes go for the apples near the ground because they are easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them; in reality, they are amazing. They just have to wait for the right guy to come along, the one who is brave.
Story of my life! Without a doubt I'm at the top of the tree. I embrace it..finally.
I have the hardest time getting motivated to go to work. Don't get me wrong, I love my job but sometimes I would rather be elsewhere...preferably engaged in some fun-filled activity. That being said, I do have a confession to make. I have a guilty pleasure;a never ending supply of hot young doctors! Eye candy galore! Oh they make the atmosphere at work so much brighter *smile* My female colleagues (including married women) are equally lust-struck... "Yes doctor?" "Anything I can do for you?" "Can I have your number?" "Marry me?" "Please??"
As for the patients... I've noticed a strong correlation between the degree of hunkiness the doctor's possess and increased patient satisfaction with services provided. "Oh you amputated the wrong leg?" "That's ok doctor, I was getting tired of it anyway."
It's not just the hunky doctors that get attention; their less aesthetically pleasing counterparts do too. The average looking ,nerdy, Joe from high school that none of the girls would be seen with gains sudden celebrity status with the doctor title. No honey, looks are an after thought, money talks here.
(Most) women are attracted to powerful men. Doctor's without a doubt exude power; it oozes from their pores. Oh and of course I forgot a minor factor; they're stinking rich!
What is it with most women and money? All you have to say is "I'm a doctor", and the world comes to a complete standstill for a second; a moment of silence as it registers in the minds of these money hungry creatures. Dollar signs! (not of the Zimbabwean kind either).What next? You'll have them hook, line and sinker. Why, it's like manna from heaven. Hallelujah it's their gateway to a disgustingly rich life!
Scenario An average looking man attempts to strike a conversation with a"beautiful twenty something year old who knows she can have any man she wants and has an inflated ego" woman... Average Joe: "Good morning!" Uppity woman: "Hey" (in a bored voice after sizing him up and ruling him out as a suitor).
Average Joe:"Great weather out there today"
Uppity woman: "Oh?" "And?" Average Joe:" Where are my manners? I apologize for not introducing myself earlier. My name is Joe, and you are? Uppity woman: (reluctantly offers her name while still sizing Joe up from head to toe)"Cheryl" Average Joe: "What a beautiful name." "May I ask how a woman of such beauty spends her time?" Uppity woman: "I work in the health field." Average Joe: "What are the odds?" "So do I." "I'm a cardiologist."
Moment of silence... K-ching $$$$$$
Uppity Woman: Really??? OMG! Yes the weather is great. It's like the best weather to be outdoors. I like to party, but I can also make a great wife. I am 5'6, 115 lbs, I don't have any kids, but would love a few someday, I love long walks at the beach, seafood, traveling, meeting new people..... Did I mention I'm single? Here's my number....
So she snags him, then what? Constant worrying about other women trying to snatch her "great catch" of a man. He is an eligible bachelor after all! That's when the claws come out, shoes are thrown off, horse hair ripped off, earrings discarded and all class thrown out the window to reveal the otherwise dormant, ghetto hood rat that lives in all women. That's someones lifeline you're playing with. Watch out now! She shall protect what's hers!
Would I date a doctor? Hell to the no! I've dated one before and let's just say it was a huge mistake. I'll save that story for another day.... I personally prefer personality over money, but hey to each his own.
Well although I will not date a doctor again, a girl can look right? *wink* Gotta go, hot doctor alert! *drool*
I have come to the wise conclusion that it's probably not the best decision for me to date younger men. Granted there are younger men who are wise beyond their years, the younger men I have dated give toddlers a bad name.
I recently dated a "man" (I use that term very loosely), who was 3 yrs younger than me. All was well in the beginning. It seemed like we would make it through. Everything was rosy and happy go lucky. I looked forward to hearing from him. The sound of an incoming text message, the special ringtone I had set specifically for him gave me butterflies. I looked forward to the next time I would spend quality time with him; see him; touch him; hear his voice; immerse myself in his captivating aura. I was smitten. Age was just an irrelevant number.
In the early stages of any of my relationships, my men can do no wrong. However, eventually I begin to notice their shortcomings. In most cases I am able to compromise, and accept them for who they are, (flaws and all), but some issues simply can't be overlooked. My "man-boy" was beginning to work my last nerve. I felt like I had acquired an unwanted child; a son I had never wanted, the annoying little brother I never had; the pesky neighborhood kid who wouldn't leave me alone. I was tempted to smack him upside the head!
He was so inappropriate. He had a neanderthal way of thinking. I can't tell you how often I cringed at the garbage that would emanate from his mouth. He didn't know what it was to treat a woman with respect. Women were a feat to be conquered; a means by which he could score more brownie points with his little friends. I suffered embarrassment of unknown measure when out in public with him. Oh how many times I wished the ground would open up and engulf me. His behavior was exasperating! His confidence level was grossly lacking, as evidenced by his possessive nature. He wanted to know what I did, at all times. Soon the text messages I had once looked forward to began to irritate me. "What are you doing?" "Who are you with?" "Any men there with you?" "Don't lie to me, how many guys are with you?"....a few of the messages I would be bombarded with hourly. When I told him off, he would sulk for hours. He was too childish for my liking. I'm sorry, babysitting doesn't come with this package.
When I finally dumped him, his pride was obviously hurt. He went about smearing me, dragging my name in the dirt, hurling insults; basically the stuff grade school break-ups are made of. Insert soap opera drama here.
Looking back now, I wonder what I saw in him. Why did I stay with him for several months? That's the $ 63,000 question. My behavior can only be explained by a temporary case of insanity. I can't believe I was with him for as long as I was. Golly! At this point in my life, cradle snatching is a path I don't want to go down again any time soon. There may be younger men who are mature but I'm not a gambler. That's not a risk I desire to take. Once bitten, twice shy.
Now thirty years into the future, I may be singing a different tune. I will not mind a young tender-roni:-) Can you say cougar!...
SoulSistah09
Image retrieved from http://www.4liv.com/images/babypads4.jpg
Long distance relationships aka LDR's are a challenge to say the least. Well at least in my own personal experience. I was once in a LDR with someone for a fairly long time. Close to 2 years to be precise. We met at a party and hit it off. The rest of the party was a blur, all I remember is being engrossed in a very interesting conversation that lasted for hours. So anyway, the guy was just in town for a short visit and would be heading back to his hometown the next day. We exchanged numbers and promised to keep in touch. True enough the week after that party, he called me, and we had a 6 hour phone conversation. We had so much to talk about, we connected on a subliminal level. As the weeks progressed,we made plans to meet. He was going to fly back to my hometown in a few weeks. That would be the first of many visits.
We were both in school therefore we had to identify a time that would not conflict with either one of our schedules. Intricate planning went into it. Whenever we flew out to meet each other, my excitement was out of this world. Upon reuniting, our mutual anticipation was replaced by joy that knew no bounds. We made up for lost time by jam packing our days with activities like sight seeing, hiking,eating out, shopping, basically spending every single hour together. Departures were the most difficult though. We got so used to spending every waking hour together that separation was heartbreaking. They were tearful events (for me anyway).
When apart, we kept the flames of our love burning through various modes of communication: talking on the phone, video chatting, texting, send smoke signals :-), whatever it took to make it work.
A LDR was the right fit for me because I am the type of person who loves my own space. I hate feeling smothered, which also goes hand in hand with the fact that I get bored easily. If I had to see my significant other daily, I would soon get bored. When my BF and I would meet, we would spend every single hour together, but that was alright with me, because I knew it was only for a short time, and then I could go back to my independent lifestyle. It was a relationship on our own terms. When we were together we were a couple, but when apart we had the freedom of singlehood.
All was not rosy though. After a while, seeds of trouble were sown in paradise. Relationships are hard work to begin with, but the challenges faced by parties in a LDR are compounded to the tenth power. Trust is key to the success of a LDR. We were not grossly lacking in that department, but occasionally I questioned his honesty. I wondered if he was up to anything dodgy when he didn't pick up my calls, or didn't reply to my texts in an "acceptable" time frame. When mistrust begins to rear it's ugly head in a relationship, it spells trouble. I liked the excitement of a long distance relationship...initially. However, it reached a point where I longed for us to be closer. I was going through some personal issues in my life, but my boyfriend couldn't physically be there for me because of his hectic schedule. There were times when he also needed my emotional support, but I wasn't in a position to provide that for him.The long distance was killing us.
There was also the tendency not to share everything with each other especially if it was depressing news. The reason being that we had such a short time to catch up at the end of the day,we wanted it to be a happy time. Consequently, there were issues we had to deal with on our own, as opposed to together, with some problems not being resolved altogether.
After a while we both got tired of the constant intricate planning before we could meet. I longed for the ability to walk, or hop into a car and go see my beau in a few minutes, to be able to have a laid back evening eating popcorn and watching movies whenever we wanted. I longed to be able to see him whenever I wanted to and not after several months as was the case. It was the beginning of the end.
The end of the relationship occurred gradually. I began to detach myself emotionally. On what would be my last visit to see him, the excitement I once had was gone.I was exhausted; tired of the cross country commute. Truth be told I was just ready to see him, get the visit over and done with, and head back home promptly. I was fed up with the whole situation. On that particular visit, I noticed a distance between us that transcended our physical proximity. The excitement our relationship once boasted had faded into oblivion.
Although my long distance relationship was not a success story, I have always wondered how the transition from the mind set of a "long distancer" to a "short distancer" plays out. There is a risk of feeling smothered when you have been used to having your own space. All of a sudden, you have to deal with someone in your face more often. Familiarity breeds contempt. How does the couple maintain the excitement? How do they keep the sparks flying? These are questions I ponder. I wonder how I would have dealt with the whole transition had my LDR worked out.
Then there is the issue of who moves, because someone in the relationship will eventually have to move if the couple desire a long term relationship. I mean you can't exactly get married to the person, and continue having a long distance relationship forever. Maybe that concept has worked for a unique couple somewhere, if that's the case, then they are the exception. So back to my point, who gets to move? What if neither party wants to move, but they still love each other, then what? Well in my case, my boyfriend assumed I would be the one to move to his city. I wasn't willing to do that though. We wanted to be together, but neither one of us was willing to pick up and move. Well maybe if we had discussed it in the beginning we could have decided the direction the relationship would take. It's obvious what happened next, we had to break up.
Granted some LDR's succeed, it involves a lot of work from both parties. It doesn't help that LDR's have their own unique challenges. There were several factors that played into the final curtain call for my LDR, but I walked away from it with valuable lessons learned. Would I do it again? Ground rules would have to be determined from the get-go.
SoulSistah09
Image retrieved from http://www.bwog.net/uploads/bb-longdistance.jpg
I will be graduating from college in a few days. What has been a long, arduous journey is coming to an end. I'm running the last leg of what has without a doubt been a marathon event. That being said, I'm dealing with an array of emotions; excitement, anticipation, relief, anxiety, fear. I look forward to the end of a grueling course load, sleep deprivation and an overall high on the Richter scale stress level. It has been an emotional rollercoaster to say the least. Many a day I would go home and burst into tears because I didn't make a grade I had worked my butt off for, or I had a 20 page paper due, or I had to deal with sometimes catty classmates.
On the flipside, I am a tad sad to be bidding farewell to what has been a major aspect of my life for what seems like eternity. You see the thing is I love learning. I'm one of those strange individuals who looked forward to the learning aspect of school: unearthing knowledge from 1657 page, 7 pound textbooks. Knowledge is power! I will also miss the carefree lifestyle college has to offer. Spring break, college parties, giggles in class, three and a half month summer vacations... For as long as I can remember, I have had hopes and dreams; goals I wish to attain. Up until this point they seemed thousands of miles away, far off into the future. Well it's different now. The time has come for me to step up to the plate and actively work towards fulfilling my dreams and accomplishing my goals. Will I be succesful? What if I fall short of expectations? What if? I am overly apprehensive.
A chapter in the book of my life is closing, to be replaced by unwritten chapters beyond my comprehension at this juncture. With graduation comes numerous expectations and responsibilities: major change. Being the creature of habit that I am, I don't readily embrace change. I get so used to the monotony that I fear deviating from the norm. Will I be able to emerge from my comfort zone and embrace change? I hope so.The shift from the mindset of a school-goer to that of a professional will definitely require a lot of work on my part.
Oh I hope I can hack it! Ready or not, the time has come. Here I come world!
I was watching a well known talk show a little while ago. The topic of discussion was women of color who bleach their skin with the goal of being lighter complexioned. There was one woman in particular who not only bleached her own skin, but went as far as bleaching her children's skin. She stated that she didn't want her children to endure the same emotional torment she suffered at the hands of schoolmates due to her darker skin color. She spoke of an overall feeling of inadequacy and inferiority. The show's host clearly didn't approve and did not mince her words when she expressed her disgust at the "Mother Bleacher's" behavior. Well the TV show host in question is a lighter skinned individual, therefore she was so far removed from the plight of her darker skinned guests.
It made me question where society's beauty ideals emanate from. We live in a society where most people strive to meet expectations set forth by "authority figures". Beauty falls under this realm. The media has a lot to do with what people perceive as beautiful. There are images of gorgeous people plastered everywhere. The tall, slender, light skinned woman, with an ample bosom is portrayed as the dream woman for most men. Is this the case though? Are all darker skinned women unattractive to men and therefore wallowing in imposed singlehood? Are all men wired the same way and therefore attracted to the same type of woman? Is there no hope for women who fall short of society's perception of beauty? I think not!
The women on the aforementioned show spoke of rejection by men which they blamed on their darker skin tones. In as much as I empathized with them, their statements raised a few questions. Could it just be that they lacked self-confidence, and therefore were not attractive to men? Could it be that they were so caught up with blaming their rejection on their skin color that they may have overlooked their own personality shortcomings? I don't have the answers to these questions, however I will say this; the greatest love of all is love for oneself. When armed with self confidence; high self esteem;a strong sense of self; however you may want to refer to it, one does not see the need to conform to norms unattainable by most. That being said, the greatest love of all may also be the most difficult love to obtain. Without a doubt feelings of inadequacy can't be overcome overnight. It's a work in progress; baby steps are key. Remember Rome was not built in a day! It's a difficult task, but possible nonetheless.
"If someone doesn't like who you are, just find someone who does..." Keep it moving...
Can a broken heart ever heal? Does the heart ache ever cease? It definitely has not for me. My brother's passing left me with an irreparably shattered heart. It is a wound that shall never heal; excruciating pain that will never subside. All I can do is learn to live with it. I lost my dear brother, and in his place I have sweet memories overshadowed by the heartache I feel. Today as I celebrate his birthday, I say a special prayer for him. I pray that God will continue to grant my family the strength to bear this heavy cross. Happy Birthday dear brother. When we were little we would say "Happy Birthday, may you live to blow 101 birthday candles". Although he was robbed of the opportunity to do that, I believe he is at a much happier place than we are. God be with you until we meet again bro. I love you.
I am at a point in my life where I have more or less given up on love. Trust me if you had dated half the people I have you would probably be looking forward to a future as a spinster with four cats. Where are the good men? They're either taken, gay, or maybe just well hidden under rocks. I'm beginning to think that it must be me. Maybe there is some truth to the blow off "it's not you, it's me" speech I have given to a few lads. Maybe the issue does lie with me. Be that as it may, one thing that's for sure is that I'm too picky. I always feel like I can do better, that my ideal man is still out there waiting to find me. Well I blame my unreal expectations on romantic novels and chick flicks. Real life does not quite work like that. I'm still holding out hope that I will meet my Mr. Right, and not have to settle for Mr. Right Now. Real, good men, where art thou?
Michael Jackson's memorial had me bawling my eyes out. It brought to the surface an array of emotions. It's so heartbreaking!My heart goes out to his little children. He was such a great father to them. I feel like I knew Michael personally. I guess all his fans feel like I do. He had a way of communicating to people through his music. It's unfortunate that it took MJ's death for people to realize just how great he was. Such greatness only comes once in a lifetime. There will never be another MJ! Never! Rest in perfect peace King of Pop. I pray that God grants his children, mother, siblings, and father the strength to endure this heart wrenching pain.
I'm running on the last bit of gas, anytime now, my engine will shut down on me. I've been hustling and bustling for the last couple of days. 12 hour shifts are a killer I tell you! I feel like someone's been using me as a trampoline, jumping all over me relentlessly. I'm sore all over. As if that isn't bad enough, I've cut out caffeine from my diet. At least with coffee I felt energized, albeit for a few hours. I made an informed decision to quit when I realized I was getting addicted to it. So far, so good. I've been able to function without it. Who knew? Now all I have to do is start working out again.
Let's take it back a couple of years... My "elders" would tell me to be careful about what I ate lest I gain weight. I tossed my head, and confidently told them that I wasn't born with the "fat gene". I was absent when it was being handed out. I had always been a skinny minny. Why would nature change it's course now?
Well fast forward to the present... Now I know what they meant! I have gained 15 pounds in the last year and a half! Gasp! That's what I get for having a sweet tooth. I've been munching on cookies and cakes like they're going out of style. "Oh I don't have the fat gene", I kept telling myself. Well I guess my "elders" had the last laugh this time around.
I guess it's safe to say my metabolism has a lot to do with my predicament. I believe it's slowed down somewhat, the older I've gotten. It's so much harder for the weight to fall off now. It's coming off, just not as fast as I would like. I've lost 4 pounds in 2 weeks, and all I've done is reduce my carb intake, and walk a little more. I rejoice at the thought of how much I'll lose when I begin a more intense workout routine.
Back to the weight gain: what's an extra 15 pounds you may be wondering? Well, that's how it starts, then it's an extra 30, then an extra 50, before you know it, you don't remember what your feet look like because you haven't seen them in eons! Well I personally would prefer my stomach to stay where it is right now, I'm not trying to lift it off my knees and tack it in my waist. No ma'am!
To everyone who is trying to lose weight, be it 5 pounds or 405lbs; take it one pound at a time, just so you don't feel overwhelmed by the amount of weight you have to lose. Just my two cents...
Texan drivers are crazy! I'll say it again, Texan drivers are crazy! Golly! I drive on the freeway almost daily, and I'll tell you every time I get off the service roads and onto the highway, I get into my "survival for the fittest mode". I have several peeves :
The Non-Indicators Something must be done about the cars they supply the Lone Star state with. For some reason, some of these cars lack turn indicators. Therefore the owners of these vehicles are forced to weave in and out of traffic with no indication whatsoever to the motorists behind them. Don't hate them though, their cars are not installed with blinkers remember?
The Brakers There are some drivers that have muscle spasms while driving. This causes them to slam on their brakes excessively while on the road. Woe unto any motorist behind this person with the spasm condition; it's contagious
The Flashers Try driving in the dark; either early in the morning or after dusk. You will most likely encounter the flasher. He wants you to move out of the way so he can take your lane. He turns his lights full blast, and turns them back low in an effort to scare you, and show you how powerful he is in his big truck.
The Bright Lighters Clearly the owners of large trucks suffer from some eye conditions that warrant them turning their lights on all the way up. They don't want to suffer from the condition alone, therefore they attempt to blind the drivers ahead of them by turning their lights on all the way up.
The Distracted ones These are either talking on the phone or are distracted in some other manner. They are so distracted, they don't bother to use their indicators. I mean why do that right? The phone conversation is clearly more important than something as minor as driving a multi-ton contraption on a super highway. So what they are placing hundreds of lives at risk?
The Video Game Players Then there are those who weave in and out of traffic like life is a video game. Swerving in and out of lanes is the order of the day. Much like what happens in video games. The only difference is that this is real life!
The Stubborn Ones Ever encounter a driver going well below the speed limit on the fast lane? It's irking! What's worse is when these overly cautious drivers are shoulder to shoulder with the drivers on the other lanes, so there is no room to change lanes and overtake them.
Is there really anything that can be done about the madness on the roads? Probably not. All I can do is be cautious.
Can you really get over someone you love? Flashback to four years ago... I started "talking' to some guy. I wasn't really interested in him initially, but with time he grew on me. I allowed myself to get emotionally attached, and completely immersed myself into what quickly became an "official" relationship. Everything was perfect, or at least I thought it was.
Fast forward to two years into the relationship... My "boyfriend" had an epiphany, and he suddenly realized that he wasn't ready to be in a relationship. Hello! After two whole years...Really? Anyway, he promptly ended the one sided "relationship", and swiftly moved on to the next catch. Meanwhile I felt like someone had ripped my heart out of my chest. The pain was indescribable. I was an emotional wreck. I hated him; but I still loved him. I never wanted to see him again; but I wanted him back. I wanted him to hurt like he had hurt me, but I wanted to see him smile again. I was torn!
Fast forward to four years post- end of "relationship" I still catch myself thinking about the lad. I am over him, or at least I think I am. Wait, I know I am. I know this because if he showed up at my doorstep this very moment, and said he wanted me back, my response would be a resounding NO. I'm at a different point in my life. Time has made me wiser; I know what I want out of a relationship now. So why do I still think about him? I don't want him back, but I still love him. There I said it, I love him BUT I'm not in love with him.
So why is it that my heart doesn't listen to my mind? It is said that you can't choose who you fall in love with; your heart is the dictator that makes that decision for you. So it is that your heart doesn't let go of what it has declared it's own. Well, needless to say I am up against a powerful dictator. Pray tell what's a girl to do?
Ever encountered a person who completely lacks phone etiquette? 1. Inclusion in conversations unwillingly I have just about had it with people who include me in their phone conversations without asking.I don't need to hear gossip about people I have never, and probably will never meet. So what her weave is a hot mess? I don't need to know all that. Whisper, or excuse yourself, and go talk outside. In the checkout lane at the grocery store, this lady just had to find out what some character called Misty wore to the club the night before.She then had the audacity to gesture to the cashier to wait until she finished her conversation! Meanwhile the rest of us in line had to grit our teeth, and wait patiently. 2. Shouting on the phone I mean really, it's so unnecessary. If the person can hear you clearly while speaking face to face in a normal voice, they should be able to hear you speak at the same or lower volume over the phone. Phones or hands free devices are pressed to the ear hint hint. 3. Ringtones I love ring tones just as much as the next person, but does the volume have to be turned all the way up? If people can hear your latest hit song ringtone from miles away, then yes it is probably just a tad too loud. 4. Driving while talking or texting. Now this one gets to me the most. Unless having that conversation on a freeway where speeds are 60-70 mph would result in a life being saved, or global warming being stopped in it's tracks, or one of America's most wanted criminals being captured, I think the conversation can wait.
5.Phone stalkers If you call me and for some reason I'm unable to answer my phone, leave a message and I'll return your call as soon as possible. It gets to me when people call, leave a message, then keep calling every five minutes leaving messages like " Hellooooo pick up the phone" . Some people leave a message like "Call me back it's extremely urgent" but when you call them back in a panic hoping to God that the emergency is not life threatening, it turns out to be nonsense. They'll be like "oh it's nothing, I just really wanted to ask what you think of the 100 degree weather. Really!
I've been glued to my TV screen for the last hour or so. Intriguing movie maybe, you may ask? Far from it, but it might as well have been. A twenty something year old man was responsible for my couch potato tendencies this afternoon. He led police in a high speed chase on the freeway. So anyway, the story is that the cops ran his plate numbers, and discovered he had a warrant out for his arrest. So being the smart man he is, he thought he could outrun "big brother". Insert chuckle here. Well the chase was brought to a screeching halt when "psychoman" ran a red light, and was consequently t-boned by an oncoming truck. Thankfully nobody was seriously hurt, no thanks to psychoman's crazy antics. By the end of the live telecast, my mood had shifted from intrigued, to mad.
So what drives people to such insane lengths? Surely he knew he would ran out of gas eventually? Maybe his fear of going to jail drove (no pun intended) him to his "straight out of an action flick" adventure mode. Maybe he was under the influence of drugs or alcohol. That would explain his behavior right? Maybe, but either way, he should still be held accountable for his actions. He put not only his life in danger, but also the lives of dozens of other motorists, and pedestrians. Self-centeredness at it's finest!
Word of advice, cooperate with "big brother". You can't outsmart him.
I just found out that Billy Mays died this morning! For night owls like myself, you know him as the bearded man with jet black hair, and a voice as large as his television personality. He is also known for his exaggerated arm movements as he pitches for products such as "Oxiclean" and "Ka-boom".
Well, I just saw him a few days ago on the Conan O'Brien show. Conan had a good laugh at Billy's expense, making fun of his informercial antics. Billy was such a good sport about it though. A few days later, Billy's gone. Poof! Just like that.
As humans, we get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday living that we forget we're living on borrowed time. Life is short people. Make your today count.
I still can't believe that Michael Jackson is gone!Michael Jackson is dead! D.E.A.D! I can't believe it! It's surreal; like a nightmare all those who love him will never awake from. I am heartbroken. I was such a huge fan. My heart goes out to his little children, his parents. his siblings, all his friends and fans around the world.I feel like a part of me has died too. The reason I say this is because MJ was synonymous with my childhood. He was our hero back in the day. I remember watching my older brothers attempt to moonwalk, dress like him, act like he did. Not to be left behind, I practiced MJ's moves, and tried my hand at singing (I was not very successful on that front ). He was like our very own super hero! He started out with the Jackson 5 (way before my time), but when I came around, I grew to love those old hits. I still love his music to this day. Even before his death, any time I heard his music on the radio, I would blast the volume and jam to his awesomeness. I know he hadn't released any new material in a while, however, I held out hope that he would one day make an explosive comeback. People can say what they want about his personal life, but there is no denying the fact that Michael was and will forever be one of a kind. He was an incredibly talented man with unquestionable appeal. His music transcended all cultural and generational boundaries. Michael, often imitated, never duplicated! There will never be another MJ. Rest in perfect peace Michael Jackson. You will live on through your music.
Why do people have to grow older? I mean really! It's so unnecessary. I wish we had a say in deciding when we want the aging process to stop. It hit me the other day while on my way to work that I've been on a steady ascent since puberty. I feel I may have reached my peak; a plateau. Is it all downhill from here? Gasp! Dare I ask when the signs of my extended stay on mother earth shall manifest? Time seems to fly once you hit adulthood. I don't remember the years during my younger days zoom past me at the speed they do now. Golly! Back then from one birthday to the next seemed like a decade. Not so much anymore! No sooner have I blown out my birthday candles than it's time for the next. Oh dear youth, why hast thou forsaken me?
Call me superficial, but why can't I just stay twenty something forever? Alright I'm asking for the impossible, so let's reach a compromise: at least let me look twenty something for the next thirty years. Pretty please? It appears to be that my pleas are falling on deaf ears. Botox in a few years anyone?
Oh well, I shall enjoy my youth while it lasts. I'll live in the moment and try not to think about a "" dentures in a glass, hard of hearing, wrinkly" future!
Where did the time go? I went to sleep as a child and woke up an adult. Oh the joy of childhood, how I miss it so. I've led two vastly different lives, that of childhood, and this life I lead now as an adult. To be honest I think I preferred my first life. The innocence of childhood was priceless. This second life is way too complicated.
I remember once sitting through what I thought was the most boring speech of all time. I was getting ready to graduate from high school and the principal took it upon herself to arm us with awareness of the reality of the world before sending us on our merry way.She painted a picture of a cold, cruel, unforgiving world. Being the smart alecs that we were, one of us students yelled out, "it's ok, we'll bundle up in heavy coats to keep the cold at bay." Har har (insert dry laugh here). Well looking back now I realize how true the principals statements were. The grown up world is so much more difficult than the world of a child. A wise person once told me to never let go of my inner child. It is without a doubt one of the best pieces of advice anyone has ever given me. I love how little kids are fascinated by the smallest things. I don't remember the last time I saw a ladybug, but when I was little they were a regular feature. It's not because they have suddenly become extinct, it's just that little ones take note of what we adults don't. Seeing the world through the eyes of a child is so fulfilling. You notice the little bushy tailed squirrels, the red-bellied bird with a broken wing, the lovely sound of birds chirping in the morning, the different colors of the rainbow after the rain among other things adults don't have the time to notice, or are simply not interested in anymore. I proudly proclaim the continued existence of my inner child. She may not be at the forefront anymore, but she makes appearances every so often, manifesting as my goofy side. I would be lost without her. She definitely keeps life interesting. I bet you're thinking I must have multiple personality disorder lol...I sure don't.I just acknowledge the presence of a "carefree, happy go lucky, rejoice in the little things" me. Try it, you'll be glad you did!
The title of Steve Harvey's new book " Act like a lady, think like a man" sparked my interest. I haven't had a chance to read it, but based on the rave reviews it's been getting I think it's worth a read.
Is it possible to think like a man though? What does it entail? Do all men have a way of thinking so drastically different from that of women? Do all men think the same?I am doubtful of the existence of a special class for men that teaches them how to act. A brain washing session is highly unlikely as well. How then is it possible to think like a man when they are not all the same? I think men have a certain way about them however, it would be folly to make blanket statements and conclude that they are all cut from the same cloth so to speak.
I've had some terrible luck with relationships. I still can't figure out the reasoning behind the actions of the men I dated. Now if I could think like a man....hmmmm that would help some. I'll read the aforementioned book and see if it will offer some insight into the complexity that is a man's way of thinking. Watch this space.
I am a twenty something year old woman(although I still think of myself as a girl tee hee), living in the diaspora.
Writing has always been my outlet. Imagine my excitement when I discovered blogging.
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